Posts Tagged ‘parking wars’

The real parking wars

March 31, 2010

So I recently discovered the show Parking Wars on A&E. It’s all about the Philadelphia Parking Authority, and their interaction with the pubic everyday, from booting cars to impounding vehicles, to simply writing parking tickets. It’s fun to watch and some of the interactions are absolutely hilarious. But I want to divert your attention to the real unscripted parking wars that take place in parking lots and parking garages everyday.

Like the time I drove into a department store parking lot. It was pretty early in the morning, so there were tons of spaces available. I spy a space and I’m about to drive into it, when I detect eyes boring into me. I looked up and there was this lady seated in a car looking daggers at me. That spot was hers and if I took it, there would obviously be consequences. So, not being too interested in consequences, I waved her into the spot, and found myself another spot……right….next….to….her.

Parking lots can be a study in human behaviour as they highlight some of life’s little ironies. Like how some people would troll the parking lot, driving around and around, because they want to get a spot right next to the business place they’re going into. If I were some of these people, I’d stop doing business there though, because if you don’t have enough energy to walk a few feet to get to the GYM……nuff said.

Then there are the stalkers, these are the ones who follow people around asking them where they’re parked and if they’re leaving (like I’m going to tell you that). Depending on where you are, this could be just a little bit creepy. There are some places where stuff like that could end up in a gunfight.

If you’re into wanton violence, a parking lot could be just the place where you could get your fill, and you don’t even need pay per view. Just look out for the dude with the GINORMOUS suv, trying to fit into a not so ginormous space between two parked cars…….and he hits one…….or both. If he’s a really good driver, he could probably make it out before the second rock hits his windscreen, then again if he was a really good driver he wouldn’t be trying to fit himself into that space in the first place.

Then there are the parking lot security people, in their fancy parking lot security people cars. Why some of them need cars in the first place is beyond me. The parking lot is like “yay” big and they either take up valuable parking spaces or get in the way of the traffic……get a bike or something.

Yeah, parking lots are where the real action is, from the VIPs who think they can park wherever they come to a stop (I’m waiting for my wife, she’s inside….dude there are dozens of people inside, go park somewhere where you’re not aggravating people)to the people with shopping carts who harbor an innate hatred for drivers (until they get into their own cars, then they harbor an innate hatred for people with shopping carts).

The parking wars on tv is pretty entertaining, but if you want some real 3D action, head for the nearest mall, pick a spot some distance from the entrance (there are always lots of spaces there), sit back, and enjoy. If you want a more “interactive” experience….well you know what to do.

Advertisements

%d bloggers like this: